"Almost only counts in horseshoes and hand-grenades."

It was one of those sayings, you just grew up hearing. It was one of the reasons "almost" was hardly ever used in my household.
"Dad, I almost got back before cerfew!" and there it was all over again, the same saying that you've heard a thousand times. This story isn't about horseshoes and it certainly isn't about hand-grenades.

Raven James Black and I had been dating for ten months, and been friends for two years. We probably made better friends than girlfriend/boyfriend, but all the same, where you are, is where you are.
Raven called me at 6:30 saying that when he got off work he wanted to see me, and since this wasn't uncommon, I agreed whole-heartedly. From the way he sounded, I assumed that he wanted a sympathetic ear, a soft hand and more than likely, a warm kiss. I would be more than happy to oblige.
So at 7:00 when, the warehouse closed down for the night, Raven dropped by my house. We had been friends for so long that he just walked up the front steps and in through the open door, greeted my brother, mom and dad, and flopped down on the couch. After positivly identifying where we were going, for how long and when we would be home, Raven and I walked out the door, and climbed into his pick-up truck. Driving down the street, he grabbed my hand over the console, and we rode in silence. Curious, I looked over at him and noticed that the trademark "Raven" smile was gone, and instead there was a firm sort of line, needless to say I was worried. Feeling that maybe something wrong had gone on either at school or work, I hesitantly broached the subject of his silence.

"Your aweful quiet." I said into the silence of the cab.
He nodded then said. "Yea, I'm thinking."
This wasn't the typical Raven talking, I decided to pour on the sweetness and told him,
"I'll give you a penny for your thoughts."
He stared at me, then turned his attention back to the road. I thought maybe he was irritated with me, but the holding of my hand dispersed that notion, and I wondered at the cause of his lack of laughter and untypical silence. Anyone who has known Raven longer than a day, knows that if hes not cracking jokes, or laughing, then something truly is grating on him.
We drove out to the edge of town. To a quiet little place where he and I had, many times, watched the sun set. As he took the exit, off of the interstate, the brief notion, that he was gonna dump me, passed my mind and kept going. No way.
As we finally reached the place where we had been so many times before, he put the truck in neutral and killed the engine and the silence thickened. Still holding my hand, he watched the sun sink lower in the big, blue Texas sky, and I waited. Finally, when the quiet was too much for even me, I asked,
   "Do you wanna talk about it?"
He shook his head and told me that he was enjoying the stillness, and his hand tightened around mine. I waited, with Raven it was always about patience.
   "Theres so much I want to say to you." He told me, after a while.
Curious, this wasn't talk for seduction or laughter and since Raven did those two things the most, I waited on tenderhooks. He looked at me, those beautiful blue eyes that I've known for so long, stared at me with something that resembled sadness.
"I don't know if we can do this any longer."
Uh-oh, this definitly wasn't what I had in mind.
"Thats o.k. next time, I'll pay for the gas."
"Cyrena, don't tease, I'm being serious."
Bad news, really bad news, and that same crazy notion of me being dumped entered into my head, and this time, it didn't leave in an all fired hurry.
"What are you saying?"
Raven looked at me oddly and said. "Your gonna make me do it, arn't you?"
At this point, the oxygen in the red single cab Dodge pick-up dropped drasticaly, either that or I just couldn't catch my breath.
"Don't tell me your breaking up with me, Raven."
He sighed, and it sounded like he was as close to tears as I was.
"Your making this really hard, Rena."
I laughed, even though nothing was funny.
"I'm sorry, I can't help it."
                 Silence.
"Maybe we should stop seeing each other."
I muttered the name of my soverign savior, knowing that he wouldn't materialize and stop Raven from proceeding with this hidious act, he let go of my hand and turned in the seat to stare at me. There was no laughter, no glint or gleam in his eyes, no laugh lines, only sadness and ironic seriousness. He ran his hand through his sandy blonde hair and said desperatly.
"Cyrena, you don't understand, I almost really loved you."
And at that point, I really did laugh.
"Almost only counts in horseshoes and hand-grenades, babe."
Raven laughed and the tension was cut in half.
"Lets just give it a break, o.k.?"
I nodded, the sun was setting but the moment wasn't right to sit and watch it together.
Driving back to my house, the first 5 minutes of the ride was quiet and something heavy hung in the air. I turned up the radio and found that he had it tuned to the rock station, I wasn't nearly surprised by that, as I was by the fact that, both me and Raven's favorite song, was playing. We started singing and laughing at each other and by the time the song was through we were back at my house. I jumped out of the cab, and gave him a smile, for the first time that night, his trademark grin jumped back into place. I slammed the door and waved as he drove off. It was a break-up and yeah, it hurt, but it hadn't been as bad as some of the others I had went through.
Telling my friends, the next day, they sympathized with me and gave me their condolences. One of my best friends, who has been there for me forever, made a comment that we had dated almost a year.
But by this point in the story, you probably already know that almost only counts in horseshoes and hand-grenades.